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Have you ever said “I’m not good enough”. Do you ever get held back at work because you think you’re not capable, or you fear making mistakes or failing? Maybe you haven’t asked someone out because you didn’t think you were good enough for them. Or maybe you don’t put yourself forward for things with your friends or family because you’re afraid you’ll disappoint them. These are things we have all felt at one time or another. It’s what you do (or don’t do!) about it that matters! EFT can help all of these feelings. The key is to make a note of these feelings and thoughts as they come up and tap on them.
You also need a bit of dedication and persistence too. Often people do not get results with EFT because they give up too quickly. One minute wonders do sometimes happen with EFT but most often you need to tap consistently for an hour or more. This can be done in several sessions – you just need to commit to doing the tapping!
Here’s a tapping script that will help.
Setup:
Tap on the Karate Chop whilst repeating three times:
- Even though I think I’m not good enough, I accept how I feel
- Even though I’m scared of failing, I deeply and completely accept myself
- Even though I worry I’ll disappoint people, I deeply and completely accept myself and all my feelings
Eyebrow: I’m not good enough
Side of Eye: I’m not as capable as others
Under Eye: I’m scared I’ll fail
Under Nose: I think I’ll disappoint people
Under Chin: I’m just not good enough
Collarbone: I hate feeling like this
Under Arm: I worry I’ll make a fool of myself
Top of Head: I’m not good enough for them
Eyebrow: I’ll fail I know I will
Side of Eye: I’ll make too many mistakes
Under Eye: I just can’t do it
Under Nose: I’m not good enough
Under Chin: I wish I could believe in myself
Collarbone: I’m worried I’ll fail
Under Arm: I wish I didn’t feel like this
Top of Head: I’m a disappointment to people
Eyebrow: What if I could do it
Side of Eye: Maybe I won’t fail
Under Eye: What if I just tried
Under Nose: Maybe I won’t disappoint people
Under Chin: What if I did succeed
Collarbone: Maybe I can believe in myself
Under Arm: What if I am good enough
Top of Head: I can do it
Remember to keep tapping until you feel better. Keep tapping on all the different things that are causing this feeling. Think back into the past and try to recall the first time you felt this way. What was going on for you back then? Tap on those events, feelings or thoughts, to get to the root of this problem.
Alex Reid, (Katy Price’s husband) is a tapper! The cage fighter has an EFT trainer who helps him deal with stress and “sort his head out”. He has suggested that X-Factor judge Cheryl Cole use his Emotional Freedom Technique Trainer to help her de-stress following her split from footballer Ashley Cole.
Reid stated: “I have to say a special thanks to Dennis, my EFT trainer. That stands for Emotional Freedom Technique. He’s like a therapist and has really helped me deal with the trials and tribulations of my new celebrity life! “
Let’s hope that Cheryl takes his advice and gains the benefits of EFT. EFT is an amazing technique that can help you deal with:
- Negative emotions
- Relationship problems
- Stress
- Anxiety
- Self-esteem
- Confidence
All of these issues can come up when you split with a partner or are going through a divorce. I know – I’ve been there! If only I’d had EFT at the time – life would have been so much better.
Ok, so it’s No Smoking Day again on March 10th. You’ve tried to quit before but failed. You find it really difficult to control your cravings & you get irritable when you’re suffering from withdrawal symptoms.
Maybe you’ve stockpiled patches or gum to help you get through the day. Or maybe you’ve decided to take the day off because you just know you won’t be able to make it through a whole day without smoking and you don’t want the hassle off people…
If any of that sounds familiar to you then there is a different solution out there! EFT or Emotional Freedom Techniques can help you quit smoking the easy way:
- Control your cravings
- No willpower required
- No patches or gum
- Ease your withdrawal symptoms
- Deal with reasons why you smoke
- Ease the anxiety of losing your comforter
- Address your concerns about failing or indeed succeeding!
- Deal with your identity as a smoker
- Empower yourself as a healthy non-smoker
For more information on how I can help you give up smoking, please go to my stop smoking page.
You can give me a call on 07866 013 637 for a free confidential, no obligation chat. Or use the contact form to drop me a line. Maybe you’re ready to find out how easy it is to stop smoking with EFT.
Ok, I’ve said it. I feel like a freak.
Have you ever said those words to yourself?
Have you ever thought, “I’m the only one who feels like this!!!”?
If you’re a woman with fertility issues, then I bet you’ve felt something like this before. If you’ve been trying for a baby for a while and had no success I’m sure you’ve said:
- Why me?
- It’s not fair
- What’s wrong with me?
- Why can’t I get pregnant?
- What have I done wrong?
- I’ll never get pregnant
Well, let me reassure you…you are not a freak! You most certainly are not alone.
I have lots of clients who experience these exact feelings. One of the most common feelings is jealousy. I am always surprised by how many women find this a taboo subject. That’s why I felt compelled to write this. I don’t want any woman to feel like a freak or that she is alone.
Jealousy is a perfectly normal emotion to experience if you are having trouble getting pregnant. You may think that everywhere you turn there is a pregnant women. Or you may see babies and toddlers where ever you go.
Let me assure you that there isn’t a sudden increase in pregnant women and babies. You are just tuned in to them and that is why you notice them. There is a special part of your brain (called the RAS – Reticular Activating System) that acts like an antenna. You are desperate to get pregnant and have a baby so your RAS responds and flags them to you everywhere you go.
Your RAS keeps showing you what you are tuned in to. It is no wonder that you feel jealousy, envy, sadness, despair every time you notice that you don’t have what you really want.
Another big emotion that then shows up is guilt! You feel guilty about feeling jealous or envious. You think “I should be happy for my best friend / sister /neighbour” etc. But you don’t. You feel jealous and envious and really wish it was you who was pregnant or just had a baby. So you feel guilty and that adds to all the negative energy and stress you are experiencing.
So what can you do about it? You do not have to suffer these emotions and feelings alone. You do not have to hide your feelings from everyone. You can get help. EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) can eliminate all of the negative feelings and stress. EFT is easy to learn and very effective.
Below are some sample tapping statements to try. Always tune in to your feelings first and score them on a scale of 0 to 10 (where 10 is the maximum intensity). Keep tapping on each emotion until it comes down to 0.
Replace the dots with whoever it is you are jealous of e.g. friend / sister / neighbour
- Even though I feel so jealous of my …………….. because she’s got a baby and I haven’t, I’m open to accepting myself and my feelings
- Even though I feel envious and I don’t want to think about my …………….. because it’s so unfair that she’s got a baby and I haven’t, I accept how I feel about this
- Even though I feel jealous of my …………….., she’s a lucky cow and it’s so unfair that she’s got a baby and I haven’t, I’m open to accepting myself
Eyebrow: I’m so jealous of ……………..
Side of Eye: I wish I could be happy for her
Under Eye: Why do I feel this envy of ……………..
Under Nose: I feel so much jealousy
Under Chin: I hate feeling all this jealousy
Collarbone: I wish I didn’t feel this way
Under Arm: All this jealousy
Top of Head: It’s so unfair that …………….. has a baby and I don’t
Take a deep breath and tune in to your feelings again. If your jealousy feelings are at zero then you can move on to the next feeling. If not, keep tapping on jealousy until you are down to zero.
- Even though I feel so sad that I can’t get pregnant, I don’t know what I’ve done wrong, I’m open to accepting myself and my feelings
- Even though I feel this sadness in my heart because I can’t get pregnant, I accept how I feel about this
- Even though I can’t stop thinking it’s all my fault that I can’t get pregnant and I’m obsessed by wanting a baby, I’m open to accepting myself
Eyebrow: All this sadness in my heart
Side of Eye: I feel so sad that I can’t get pregnant
Under Eye: I’m desperately sad because I can’t have a baby
Under Nose: I feel so sad that I’m not pregnant
Under Chin: I hate feeling all this sadness and desperation
Collarbone: I wish I didn’t feel this way
Under Arm: All this sadness in my heart
Top of Head: It’s so unfair that I can’t get pregnant
Remember to use your words, where appropriate. Keep on tuning in to each emotion or feeling in turn and tap until it is down to zero before moving on to the next one. Keep on tapping until you have worked on all of your emotions and stress.
If you would like some help with Emotional Freedom Techniques, I would love to help you. I offer sessions worldwide over the telephone or on Skype. If you would like a face to face session I do these in Cardiff or Exeter and Okehampton, Devon. Please give me a call on 07866 013 637 or use the contact form. I offer a free telephone consultation for you, to see if you would like to work with me. I look forward to helping you overcome your negative emotions and stress.
I used to meditate every day. Then I kind of “fell off the wagon” and never really got back on properly. I would do it again sporadically. Sometimes I’d get into a good groove and do it for months, other times I’d not do it for months.
I recently changed that though. I started again and I noticed how easy it was! I just slid right into my groove – like never before. No struggling to “get into the zone”.
I had two amazing meditations recently, that I want to share.
Sense Garden
I stood before a wooden gate, so I turned the handle and went through it. I found myself in a beautiful garden. It seemed to simulate all of my senses. As I walked through the garden, I could feel the sunshine on my skin. There was a beautiful scent in the air as I walked in further. There was a herb garden with rosemary, basil, coriander and mint. Then there were climbing plants with wonderful scents like honeysuckle and clematis.
My eyes were treated to an amazing array of flowers of all colours, like sunflowers, gerberas, red hot pokers and irises. There were also lots of different coloured shrubs, bushes and ferns. As I walked along a path, I realised that the path was made of gravel and I could hear it crunching under my feet. I came upon a water feature with a mini waterfall and I stood listening to the calming sound of running water. The energy around the waterfall felt incredible. As I moved on, I heard birds and bees and noticed a wind chime, gently chiming in the light breeze. I found myself wanting to sit down and noticed a wooden seat. The texture of the seat was smooth and I felt comforted as I sat there. I also noticed other textures up ahead, where there was a stone statue. I ran my hands over the curves and straight lines and felt all the different textures. This contrasted with a metal sculpture which was cold and silky smooth to touch.
I continued to walk ahead and came across a hammock. I picked a clementine from a nearby tree and laid myself down on the hammock. The clementine was sweet and juicy and smelt really zesty. My body felt relaxed and comfortable as I swayed gently in the breeze. At the end of my meditation, I felt really relaxed and like I had been treated to a sense treat.
Native American Sweat lodge
This meditation immediately started with me walking towards a sweat lodge. I walked through a path through some trees, where wind chimes were hanging. We were cleansed with sage outside the sweat lodge, then we entered one by one and sat cross-legged in a circle. The medicine man began in leading our prayers and offered up chants. We each passed around the peace pipe before the stones were brought in and the water poured on. I could feel the heat rise in my body as the steam filled up the lodge. During the ceremony, 4 animal spirits came to me. They were the eagle, the beaver, the wolf and the turtle.
After the ceremony I walked up a mountain, with several other people. At the top of the mountain was a medicine wheel. The medicine man again offered prayers and we all joined him in chanting. After this ceremony, I again saw the great eagle, though this time he was soaring on the thermals above the mountain. I felt very light and clear after this meditation.
These meditations both just “came” to me. I did not (consciously anyway) intend to have these experiences. There are many ways of meditating and some days nothing spectacular happens – it’s just me quieting my mind chatter, watching my breath, come and go. I feel especially blessed when I experience meditations like these two and equally satisfied to just “be”.
I’d love to hear about other people’s experiences.
